Nurses Pick Up Lines
- Baby you’re so sweet you’re gonna put me in DKA!
- You really turn me on…q 2 hours.
- Playing doctor is for kids…let’s play gynecologist!”
- Wanna feel safe tonight? Sleep with an EMT.
- Please don’t be too sweet. I might get Diabetes!
- Fire Fighters play with their hoses, I bring the bed
- You’ve got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
- Trust me, this is how they did Mammograms back in the old days.
- I am ADHD and you are my Ritalin, because you make me want to behave and have my attention on you.
- I am developing astigmatism. But when I’m with you I can see clearer.
- You breathe oxygen? We have so much in common.
- Your bus or mine?
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Nursing Pick Up Lines
- Is there something in your eye? Oh wait, its just a sparkle.
- My love for you burns stronger than my urinary tract infection.
- Do you know that you are Sodium and I am H2O? Because wherever you go, I go.
- Are you Broca’s Aphasia? Because you leave me speechless.
- Hey baby, wanna play with my corpus cavernosum?
- I’m a medic, I know your body better then you do!
- No that’s not an epi-pen in my pants, I’m just happy to see you.
- Sorry if I’m such an obsessive-compulsive, but I love the way I repeatedly tell you, “I love you! I love you! I love you!”
- I’m used to staying up all night
- Ever slept with an EMT? Want to?
- Sit back and relax…I fix broken hearts.
- I am manic-depressive on you. I calm down and cheer up when I’m with you.
- Baby, you make me vasodilate!
- Does this rag smell like chloroform?
- I’m good with multiple partners
- Your calves must be aching. Because you’ve been back-marching through my mind all day.
- (Look for any small skin imperfection) Has anyone ever looked at that? Why don’t we go back to my place so I can give you a full exam?
- We are prepared for any rhythm
- I need a life. Please lower your standards and go out with me.
- You’ve got beautiful veins
Pick Up Lines for Nurses
- Are you a nurse? Because you cured my erectile disfunction.
- We should get some coffee… Because I’m liking you a latte.
- We always come when we are called
- Are you lost Ma’am? Because heaven is a long way from here.
- Are you a doctor? Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
- I’m familiar with Latex and restraints
- Is your name Osteoporosis? Because you’re giving me a serious bone condition.
- You make my dopamine levels all silly.
- I’m the best in rapid clothing removal
- Did you hear that? Even my heart murmurs, “I love you!”
- I need to practice my trauma assessments. Will you be my patient?
- On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?
- My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.
- I’m feeling a little off today. Will you turn me on?
- Do you have an inhaler? You took my breath away.
- My sudden protracted cardiac arrhythmia makes me think I’m falling for you.
- I don’t want an apple a day, because I don’t want you to go away.
- No one else can cut off your clothes, restrain you, and sedate you like a medic can… Wanna play?
- My adductor isn’t the only thing that’s longus.
- Why is it so hard to study the cardiovascular system? Because the heart is fragile and should always be handled with care.
Dirty Pick Up Lines for Nurses
- I’m an expert in mouth-to-mouth
- I love the way you make me vasodilate.
- Is that a Laryngoscope handle in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
- EMTs come when people go down
- Wanna join the code 3 club?
- Are you my appendix? Because I don’t understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
- I think my vestibulocochlear nerve is damage, I keep falling for you.
- How about we ditch this joint and go study some anatomy?
- If only I could fly, I would flight my ideas for you.
- Wanna see if we can drown out the siren?
- I’d love to do a 12 lead on you
- Are doing valsalva maneuver on me? Because you just made my heart stop beating for a while.
- Come into my office and take off your pants.
- I’d like to find another doctor. Why? Because I’ve got a crush on you. Would you like to grab lunch sometime?
Nurse Pick Up Lines Tinder
- (Hold out a stethoscope) Why don’t you listen to your heart and go out with me?
- Stand back, I’m a doctor. You go get an ambulance, I’ll loosen her clothes.
- I have all sorts of protection
- I think you have nice veins. Can I pick up your line?
- Can I take your temperature? Because you’re looking hot today.
- When we first met I couldn’t get you out of my mind, now I can’t get you out of my heart.
- If you were a laser, you’d be set on “electrifying”.
- Excuse me, I think you dropped something: My jaw.
- I’m like a doctor, actually an orthodontist, I’m gonna have to ask you to, ya know, uh take off your clothes
- I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin Me.
- When you walked in the door your beauty hit me so hard that I have a priapism from all the trauma.
Dirty Nurse Pick Up Lines
Best Nurse Pick Up Lines
- Is your name Flecainide? Because I think you just made my heart skip a beat.
- Are you a pulmonary embolism? ‘Cause I can’t breathe when I’m around you.
- If I go into cardiac arrest will you give me mouth to mouth?
- I wish I was your coronary artery, so that I could be wrapped around your heart.
- Wanna play ‘Doctor’, Doctor?
- If you need a love doctor, I have like a medicated degree.
- Do you have my other lung? Because I’ve been LUNG-ing for you.
- I can make your heart skip a beat. No really, I’m certified to do it!
- My body is in a RAAS every time I see you. (Renin-Angiotensin-Aldosterone System)
- I hope you passed CPR because you’re taking my breath away
- You have acute angina.
- I’m no organ donor, but I’d happy to give you my heart.
- Keep talking… I’m diagnosing you.
- Is it just my olfactory or you just really smell good.
- Those clothes look uncomfortable… need me to cut them off for you?
- You look familiar. Did we have class together? I could have sworn we had chemistry.
- That pulsation in my femoral sheath isn’t coming from an artery.
- Can you be my proximal because I don’t want to be distal to you.
- Did you damage my cerebellum? Because I’m falling all over the place for you.
- Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.
- Whenever I’m near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away.
- I am an organ donor, need anything?
- Are you my SA node? I can’t live without you because you are the reason why my heart keeps beating.
Funny Nurse Pick Up Lines
Pick Up Lines To Use on Nurses
- I can find every pulse in your body!
- Hey, are you a conditioned stimulus? Because you’re making me drool.
- Hey girl, you’re like a car accident, because I can’t look away.
- They don’t call me Bones because I’m a doctor.
- Do you believe in love at first site, or do I have to walk by again?
- I don’t want to go all Freudian on you, but cute doctors pull strong feelings from me because they’re a safe target for feelings I originally had for my parents.
- Blood is red, cyanosis is blue, I get tachycardia when I think of you.
- You are my iodine, lithium, potassium, einsteinium and uranium. Because “I LiKE U”.
- You give me premature ventricular contractions.
- You know, I’ve been highly trained to stick things into people…
- I have my own multi-positional bed
- I might need life alert, because I’ve fallen in love with you and can’t get up.
- I’ll shock the socks off you
- Where there is a pulse there is a chance.
- I think I’m developing tics. I just can’t help but wink at you.
- You must be the one for me… Since my selectively permeable membrane let you through.
- Medics know how to pick you up 5 different ways
- Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.