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Questions To Ask Your Unfaithful Spouse

Relationships take time to build and you should give your partner a good chance to understand you.  but then sometimes and some people Can become Unfaithful. It can be a very difficult (in fact a heartbreak and shock one) experience to find out your partner is cheating. 

At first, you may not want to talk to them anymore but it’s important to ask some questions before you let them go. There are so many unanswered questions and so many overwhelming emotions.

This list of questions to ask your unfaithful spouse is not something you would think to be of importance, these can save your marriage from breaking apart (or can save you from a marriage that has no future in reality).  Unfortunately, not all unfaithful partners will react with honesty, humility or empathy when their betrayal is discovered. but the answers to such questions would serve no purpose other than deepening your wounds.

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Investigative Questions for Couples Experiencing Infidelity

After the initial phase of crisis and the emotional roller coaster. it is time to think about, how can you engage in a meaningful conversation that will not disintegrate or blow up the relationship? 

you should keep an open mind in this situation and that will ease the situation. Your partner will be more comfortable talking about this. 

But you still wonder why this happened and what it all means. Questions can help you to find out that. But asking detective questions will not help you to find out answers.

Here are some questions that will open up the possibility for broader conversations. 

  • What did the affair mean to you?
  • Why did it happen then?
  • Were you looking for it? Did it just happen?
  • Did you feel entitled to your affair?
  • Did you feel guilty?
  • What did you discover about yourself in that relationship? How did you feel about it?
  • Did you discover new parts of yourself or recover lost ones in that relationship?
  • Why do you think you could not express your needs to me, emotional, intellectual or
  • sexual?
  • Do you think you could show me those newly discovered parts?
  • What do you want me to know about your affair?
  • Do you think I have a say in it?
  • Is it okay if I don’t want to know anything?
  • Did you want me to know and were you hoping to tell me? Were you relieved when I
  • did?
  • Once I found out, what did you think would happen to you and to the two of you?
  • Did you hope I would find out without you telling me?
  • Were you afraid I would find out or did you assume that I never would?
  • Did you lie out of deception or were you hoping to protect me with your lies?
  • What was it like for you to lie?
  • Did you tell anyone about your affair?
  • What was it like for you when you would come home?

Questions To Ask the Other Woman

  • What did he tell you about us?
    Was he easy to get?
  • Did you ever worry that your affair would destroy our relationship?
  • Would you have ended it if I hadn’t found out?
  • If my partner (he or she) comes back to me are you sure that you want to continue your relation with him or her ?